Anyway let me get into the story. Brace yourself, it is LONG.
It was 2012. I had just moved to a new state. I was looking for a job as my savings account was depleting fast. My mother was also putting pressure on me to be aggressive in my job search. At this time, I did not have a car (my car was old and I didn't think it would make sense to have it shipped across state lines) which added another layer of difficulty as I had to limit my search to a 10-15 mile radius. I tried everything, posted my resume everywhere to no avail. Finally, I decided to check Craigslist. Those who are familiar with Craigslist know it can be a very shady website and it is important to navigate with caution. With that said, there are some hidden gems on the site and I would not knock it completely. Anyway, after spending hours scrolling through ads on craigslist, I stumbled on an ad: "seeking a personal assistant." I read the job description, and it sounded like a good fit. I applied without expecting to hear back as I had filled out hundreds of applications at this point.
Lo and behold, a few days later, I received an email explaining in detail what the position entails, the compensation, hours etc. I was optimistic. I thought, finally this is it! I was invited for an in-person interview a few days later at a Starbucks a few miles from my house. I felt nervous and apprehensive about meeting a complete stranger but the fact that the meeting was in a public space gave me a sense of comfort. On the day of, I put on my interview suit and was out of the door. I walked in and it was the typical Starbucks atmosphere: conversations buzzing left and right and the strong smell of coffee. I found the person I was interviewing with sitting down in the middle of the store facing the door. It was a young, 20-something, Indian guy. I introduced myself, sat down and the interview began.
20-30 minutes later, the interview was done. It was a typical interview, nothing out of the ordinary. I thought it went well and he was definitely interested in hiring me. The next step was to meet the rest of the team. Although I would be his PA and working remotely for the most part, there would be instances where I would have to attend team meetings. So he felt it was appropriate to meet the entire team. He told me he would email me with further details. I was once again, optimistic.
A couple of days later, I received an email with details on the meeting. It was going to be a dinner with about 4 or 5 people. I can't really remember. Since I did not have a car, he offered to pick me up and take me to the restaurant we will be meeting. I obliged as I thought it was a nice gesture.
On the day of the dinner, he picked me up as planned and we were off. On the way, he said we would need to make a detour to his house because he needs to pick up something. Also, the team was running late and it might be better for them to just meet us at his house and we all go to the restaurant together. At that point, I felt slightly uncomfortable but didn't think there was any cause for alarm.
It was 2012. I had just moved to a new state. I was looking for a job as my savings account was depleting fast. My mother was also putting pressure on me to be aggressive in my job search. At this time, I did not have a car (my car was old and I didn't think it would make sense to have it shipped across state lines) which added another layer of difficulty as I had to limit my search to a 10-15 mile radius. I tried everything, posted my resume everywhere to no avail. Finally, I decided to check Craigslist. Those who are familiar with Craigslist know it can be a very shady website and it is important to navigate with caution. With that said, there are some hidden gems on the site and I would not knock it completely. Anyway, after spending hours scrolling through ads on craigslist, I stumbled on an ad: "seeking a personal assistant." I read the job description, and it sounded like a good fit. I applied without expecting to hear back as I had filled out hundreds of applications at this point.
Lo and behold, a few days later, I received an email explaining in detail what the position entails, the compensation, hours etc. I was optimistic. I thought, finally this is it! I was invited for an in-person interview a few days later at a Starbucks a few miles from my house. I felt nervous and apprehensive about meeting a complete stranger but the fact that the meeting was in a public space gave me a sense of comfort. On the day of, I put on my interview suit and was out of the door. I walked in and it was the typical Starbucks atmosphere: conversations buzzing left and right and the strong smell of coffee. I found the person I was interviewing with sitting down in the middle of the store facing the door. It was a young, 20-something, Indian guy. I introduced myself, sat down and the interview began.
20-30 minutes later, the interview was done. It was a typical interview, nothing out of the ordinary. I thought it went well and he was definitely interested in hiring me. The next step was to meet the rest of the team. Although I would be his PA and working remotely for the most part, there would be instances where I would have to attend team meetings. So he felt it was appropriate to meet the entire team. He told me he would email me with further details. I was once again, optimistic.
A couple of days later, I received an email with details on the meeting. It was going to be a dinner with about 4 or 5 people. I can't really remember. Since I did not have a car, he offered to pick me up and take me to the restaurant we will be meeting. I obliged as I thought it was a nice gesture.
On the day of the dinner, he picked me up as planned and we were off. On the way, he said we would need to make a detour to his house because he needs to pick up something. Also, the team was running late and it might be better for them to just meet us at his house and we all go to the restaurant together. At that point, I felt slightly uncomfortable but didn't think there was any cause for alarm.
I was surprised when he pulled into this driveway and I saw a massive old colonial house. We walked in and the first thing I noticed, was how cold it was. He noticed I was uncomfortable and tried to get me to relax by making small talk, telling me some history about the house. He then asked me what I like to drink, and I said martinis. Don't ask me why. I do not even like martinis. I think it was something about the fancy house I was in. I wanted to come off as sophisticated. He had a mini bar and mixed the martinis. It was strong AF. He also laid out a charcuterie board with different cheeses, crackers, meats etc. He told me to relax and get comfortable while we wait for "our colleagues." To lighten the mood, he decided to play some music. We were having conversations that had nothing to do with work and that is when I started to think, okay this is getting really weird. Also, I really couldn't drink my cocktail. One, because it was strong AF and two, because I thought, "what if he wants to Bill Cosby me?" So all I did was take half a sip every 10 mins or so and kept staring at my phone wondering what happened to the people who were supposed to be meeting us. I think I may have texted a friend who was in a completely different state to call the police if he doesn't hear from me. I felt silly and dramatic for sending the text but thought, better safe than sorry.
We kept conversing and at some point he asked me if I would like a tour of his house. It was a very nice house as I mentioned, and I said sure. He took me around, gave some history of the art hung on the walls. He took me upstairs to his bedroom, it was freezing. I thought to myself, why would this guy live in this massive, cold house all by myself. Anyway, we went back downstairs to the living room and he asked me why I wasn't drinking and I told him, it was a bit strong. He offered to help me dilute it by adding water. I said okay. I knew I was going to keep babysitting that damn drink even if it was down to 99% water and 1% alcohol.
The next sequence of events happened very quickly and it has been 8 years since this happened so the details are very foggy. After bringing me back my watered down drink, I remember he made himself another drink. At this point, I could tell that he was getting drunk. Weirdly enough, that didn't scare me, that made me feel like I was in control. I was 100% sober and here is this stranger getting sloppy. At this point, I knew there was nobody meeting us, there was no job, and this was all a ruse. So I started planning my escape strategy. I continued conversing with him and he continued drinking and getting drunker. He came to sit next to me on the couch and started rubbing my leg. I was shocked but I kept my composure. He started getting very handsy and before I knew it, he pulled me ontop of him and was trying to pull my pants down, I said, "NO!" "STOP!" repeatedly but he wasn't hearing me. He tried to finger me and I told him to stop while trying to peel myself off him. He was surprisingly strong. He started pleading and begging me to let him finger me and at this point, I lost it. "I came here to meet my "new coworkers," so what the fuck is this? Are you crazy?" With that said, I got up, called a cab and left. I never heard from him or saw him again.
I was not raped, kidnapped or worse killed. Not because I was smart. Matter of fact, all the decisions I made that night put me in harm's way. I am able to tell this story years later because I was incredibly lucky. I guess my mother's prayers were working overtime. To this day, I do not know what that man's intentions were, although I have come up with several theories. At the end of the day, I decided to share this story because I want people like me, young black women, to be able to learn and protect themselves at all times.
Moral of the story: stay away from Craigslist. Hahaha just joking. Craigslist can be awesome.
